Budget grumbles - 2. Education and unemployment.

This is a continuation of the previous post: Budget grumbles 1.

Those protesting at the recent marches could have been apprentices, child care workers, nurses, firefighters, or people training to be paramedics. These are all valued and respected careers where course fees are likely to increase significantly. Protesters could be anyone deeply and negatively affected by the budget. Are they all ferals as the front page of the Daily Telegraph would like us to believe?  I seriously doubt it.

University degrees will cost up to three times as much under a deregulated fee system, leaving graduates with $120,000-plus debts, according to the architect of the HECS student loan scheme.

This is significantly more than the fees paid by current MP's. Many of whom enjoyed a free education! 

ThIs loud, demanding headline, and indeed most of the page, blithely disregards the actual facts about getting a job. But you wouldn't want to let a fact get in the way of an eye-catching smokescreen of headline.

Such inconvenient things facts. 

"GET A JOB" 

 
In February, there were a total of 140,800 job vacancies in Australia, and more than 700,000 people out of work. Here and here. 

They are the official figures and don't account for those who are chronically underemployed, those on short term contracts who have no idea where there next job will come from, or the people barely able to make ends meet working a few shifts per week with no job security.

University students who are the target in the article above, study in a wide variety of areas. Most will work extremely hard to earn their degrees.  When they graduate they're understandably excited to have achieved a goal, and naturally would like to work in a career related to their field of study.  Instead, far too many are under-employed in unfulfilling, un-challenging jobs, not related to those years of study. 

Under-employment and unemployment is devastating for them, their parents and others who understand the challenges and difficulties of finding a permanent job in this climate, particularly one drawing on their specific training and skills. Is it any wonder they might be protesting at the budget? 

To nastily and falsely imply that all students are lazy spongers is disgusting. To encourage others to deride and vilify them is shameful. If anger is to be expressed, it should to be directed at those who manufactured this unfair budget, not those most affected by its consequences.

Some of the protesters could well be science graduates who've watched formerly respected and valued jobs in the sciences disappear with whirlwind speed before their eyes.

Until the current government gained power, science was generally respected in Australia. We have a long and proud tradition of innovation and inventions which have been celebrated the world over. Only recently has that changed dramatically.

Science graduates, particularly those with specialties in environment, climate, climate change adaptation, sustainability, oceanography and a range of other areas are unlikely to get a job in their chosen career in the near future in Australia. The jobs aren’t there any more. 

Our young people haven’t chosen these difficult courses on a whim, for status or for the money. They've chosen them because they want to contribute. They want to be involved in a positive and proactive way, to help Australia adapt responsibly and resourcefully to the significant and ongoing challenges we all face with our changing climate. 

When the current Minister for the Environment was writing passionately about saving Port Phillip Bay from dredging, (but doesn't apply the same logic or respect to the Great Barrier Reef), these students could have been choosing their demanding senior year maths and science subjects to enable them to get into high scoring, and extremely challenging courses.

They’ve been working towards their degrees for many years and are now seeing jobs that they would have aspired to in science gone, and whole departments and organisations disappearing. They've seen highly regarded world class scientists treated with derision and contempt by the Abbott government.  

And yet the headlines shout a very different message. Unpleasant headlines structured carefully to discredit and vilify students, the same students who are being lumbered with a budget and debt, designed to make their lives significantly harder. And if they can't find a job? Let's blame them, rather than looking honestly at the source of the problem or think creatively about solutions.

The unemployed go job hunting 

In Hobart this morning, Mr Abbott was unsympathetic about the prospect of people going interstate in their search for a job.

Really?! Is the PM so out of touch that he has no idea that without a reasonable job, or more than a few hours work per week, or without the luxury of a huge amount of savings, it’s a bit of a challenge to get a lease on an apartment? Where are unemployed people, moving interstate to find a job, meant to live? On the streets? Not to mention eating, transport, dressing suitably for interviews and paying for internet so you can actually apply for a job IF there's one advertised. The expenses of day to day living are high, as most normal people can attest to, and they go on, and on, and on …. and on. Living interstate to search for work is simply not feasible for many unemployed people. 

This ability for the PM to live so far removed from the reality of the lives of our students, the disabled, retirees, single parents, indigenous Australians and so many others, is astounding. This parallel universe reminds me of the much loved Enid Blyton book, The Magic Faraway Tree with the amazing revolving lands at the top of the tree. You never knew which land you'd end up in when you climbed the tree.

Unfortunately for everyday Australians it seems that the current government enjoys Fantasy Land where “everything is awesome” but they also regularly visit Topsy Turvy Land where lies are presented as truth, where integrity is passe, where less is more, and where it's good and proper for the weakest to support the strongest. 

Mere mortals, the bulk of everyday Australians, are stuck in Nightmare Land experiencing a callous, dismissive indifference to their concerns. Fearful about how they'll manage once the budget takes effect, their questions are flippantly avoided. Everyday Australians, my clients, my neighbours, my community, live in a very real world where wealthy parents may not exist to support you, and generous scholarships (and here) are the stuff of dreams.

But as a number of commentators are saying, what did people really expect ,when they voted for the coalition - kindness, compassion and tolerance?

Labor’s values 

We are all in this together. Where this means a community where everyone works towards the health and security of the whole community. The collective wealth of the economy serves this community. Not the other way around. 

Liberal’s values 

We are all in this together. Where this means a free-market economy where a person’s wealth determines their status, and in turn their status determines their privilege and their privilege determines their access to health and security. If someone can’t access health and security, this is their own fault and it’s not the free-market economy’s role to help them. So in fact, we’re not all in anything together. We’re all on our own. 

These values can be found in the true narratives of both parties, intertwined in every policy they produce, and every statement they make. To find them, you don’t have to look very hard. In fact, you don’t have to look for them at all. All you have to do is open your eyes. Australian voters have had our eyes opened for us. But I just hope that those who feel most let down, the ones who are suffering in silence now because they were the dopes who voted for Abbott, I hope they save some of their resentment for the mainstream media (see below) for so blatantly letting them down by feeding them to the wolves. (my bold)

http://theaimn.com/2014/05/17/a-wolf-in-sheeps-clothing/

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Budget grumbles -1. Media

It's Interesting that after the disastrous budget, the Murdoch media is currently working overtime to vilify students and disability pensioners, and whilst it makes a welcome change from the prejudice directed towards asylum seekers and the lies surrounding their issues, it's no less repugnant. They are however providing a wonderfully rich resource for teachers, particularly those working with English, clear thinking, logic, media and even maths students. 

The ferals are revolting! 

There is no room for misunderstanding the reaction expected of the reader, who is now primed to agree and demonise those who are protesting, without having any idea who they are or what they're protesting about.

The Daily Telegraph directs us to focus on a small group of presumably angry protesters and a prominent policeman. Did the photographer or some other person encourage the people to point dramatically? Is the policeman placed there to remind us that ferals need to be kept in their place? A quiet, orderly protest isn't nearly as dramatic as one with "action". 

One wonders how the picture has been cropped. Who was to the right of the person in purple? Was it someone older who’d benefitted from the free education enjoyed by many of the Prime Ministers generation and who believes that a well resourced and equitable education system, available to the whole population, makes for a strong and vibrant society? Was it a man under 30 living in an area of high unemployment, wondering how he'll support his family if he's laid off. 6 months without unemployment benefits is a long time. What has been cropped is just as important as what has been highlighted.

The huge headline LIVING ON EASY STREET is dramatically placed under the action shot of people pointing.  A cursory glance would imply that living on easy street refers to those vile and scary 'ferals' - it doesn't, and is completely unrelated. Nothing about the disastrous poll, nothing prominent about the diverse and valid reasons for the protests. No insight provided for curious readers.

In contrast, note the almost sombre tone of the Sydney Morning Herald where poll results are placed prominently, reflecting the strong and angry reaction by ordinary, everyday Australians to the budget. Further information is provided for those choosing to delve further. 

Everyday Australians targeted
For some details about how ordinary, everyday Australians, our neighbours, and others in our communities will be affected by this unfair budget look here. There you'll find some of the figures that which are usually shared openly on budget night. 

More than one third of the budget cuts - $6 billion - fall on the middle quintile of households, earning $45,000 to $63,000. 

■ Families with school-age children are the hardest hit. Across all income groups, they will lose $15.9 billion over four years, more than 90 per cent of the total. 

■ Low and middle-income sole parents suffer worst of all, losing between 10 and 15 per cent of their annual income - $4000 to $6250 - on family earnings of less than $60,000 by the time the changes to welfare take full effect in 2017-18. 

■ The burden rises sharply for families with children over the four years of the budget. For example, a sole parent earning $60,000 with children aged eight and 12 will lose $1808 in annual income in 2014-15 and $6278 in 2017-18. 

Low- and middle-income earners, especially those with school-age children, are hit hardest as the family tax benefit for single-income families is abolished and indexation is curbed. 

And that's fair? To target low and middle income earners yet not the wealthy?

...

The Daily Telegraph ran a front-page story about there being more people on disability in NSW than died during the World Wars. 

In what way is this relevant? In what sad world is encouraging readers to further marginalise and sneer at disability pensioners, rather than show compassion and understanding  considered acceptable?

Apart from them apparently running the same divisive line a few years ago, they chose a picture of a long queue of people appearing to line up to receive their disability payments. Placed carefully next to a picture of diggers we're encouraged to agree - Diggers did it tough. They suffered. Disability pensioners aren't as worthy as them. 

It turns out this photo is a fairly common piece of royalty-free stock imagery. A Google image search finds this and this and this. It's not related to real Australians on pensions.

But it's too easy to just cruelly vilify those on disability support, and imply that they're bludgers rather than give accurate, reasoned and intelligent insight into the real issues. There's a more thorough assessment here.

This kind of manipulation appears designed to influence and deflect the anger so many feel against the cruel budget. It's a blatant attempt to discredit our fellow citizens who have genuine concerns about how they'll manage with a variety of cuts and persistently increasing costs. These tactics target those least able to respond, and look like a smelly smokescreen to take people's minds off the real issues of inequity, unfairness and a wider gap between the have's and have not's that will be the outcome of the budget . 

AXE THE TAX

Is everybody really being asked to help with the heavy lifting?

Who isn't being supported by this budget? What happened to the end of the age of entitlement?

Is the government able to maturely handle the anger directed at them in response to their unfair budget? Do they need the Murdoch press to shield them by pointing the manipulative finger of outrage towards those negatively affected? (rhetorical question) 

When mining companies were threatened with a fair tax, they used their extraordinary financial resources and complained loud and long. Why is it ok for exceptionally profitable, multinational mining companies to protest, yet not ordinary Australian citizens? Is anyone in government able to explain, without resorting to predetermined cliches, why those least able to pay are being hit hardest, while those most able are barely touched? (another rhetorical question)

to be continued... here Budget Grumbles 2. Education and unemployment.

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Street performers - sometimes creepy, always entertaining!

Have you heard the expression

"The job was handed to him on a plate"?

This probably wasn't what you were thinking of ...

photo credit: D.Watson

or perhaps the performer had received advice on

"How to get ahead in your career"!

photo credit D.Watson

Are you talking about me behind my back?

photo credit: D.Watson

Various careers require excellent balance and poise, though some might say of this man -

"He was sitting down on the job"

Bad puns I know, but street performers seem to bring that out in me ;-)

Seriously though, these artists are worth their weight in gold (oh dear there's another one) and I have huge admiration for them; I also thoroughly enjoy watching the audience discussing the show and trying to work out how it's done.

The performer above not only managed to hold the pose, and cross and uncross his legs, but maintained his composure when one woman practically crawled under him to look up at his bottom to see how he was "magically" sitting in thin air!

A tiny stage, some props and confidence
-  almost all you need to begin!

These modern day performers providing walk-by entertainment are following in the footsteps of an age old form of employment and although the costumes and makeup might be different from what was seen hundreds of years ago, they still need to pull an audience and encourage them to give money, to enable them to make a living.

A fine Jazz group on the Charles Bridge in Prague are not only performing, but selling CDs to an appreciative audience.

A delightfully random piano recital at a railway station ...

Prague.

This gentleman's kit included a quality sound system but unfortunately there were very few passers-by when I saw him.

Ulm. Germany

All jobs have their particular challenges and street performers are no exception. I found myself wondering how a job advertisement for a mime artist would be worded:

The position

This free-lancing job provides a daily adrenaline rush, inconsistent hours and unpredictable income. You'll be your own boss and must have good planning and financial management to sustain you during the lean times. There is the potential to be 'discovered' and take the world by storm. Would suit a person who thrives on unpredictability, works well alone and has the ability to think on their feet.

Key selection criteria

• Excellent body control
• The ability to remain motionless for extended periods of time
• Proven ability to engage the attention of a distractible, fickle audience
• The ability to engage people of different ages and nationalities and encourage them to part with money, using only gestures and facial expression - ie outstanding non-verbal skills
• Enjoy working at different ourdoor locations (known as a pitch) and able to assess pedestrian traffic to gain maximum exposure with as few other distractions as possible
• Desire to work in varied and changeable weather conditions
• Have a repertoire of poses to deflect hecklers and those determined to get a reaction
• Self belief and confidence
• Skills with make up and costume design
• A willing accomplice to assist with the set up and dismantling of the equipment
• Be prepared to put in a lot of time "out of hours" to fine tune the act
• 
  
• ... and most of all, excellent bladder control is vital or you'll be scampering in a most un-angel-like way, down from your pedestal, intent on finding a suitable location to find 'relief'.

More information for those wanting to enter the profession: 

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-Money-Busking-(Street-Performing)

http://www.myjobsearch.com/careers/street-performer.html

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Crunchy wholesome career biscuits

A satisfying career is like a good biscuit recipe! 
(An imperfect but potentially useful analogy)

There's something to get your teeth into.

It's nourishing.

There are occasional interesting bits, to provide variety.

You can adapt it to suit you better as your tastes change over time.

You'll occasionally botch it up, but you can always learn from experience.

Sometimes it's worth trying something completely different to see what happens.

What at first appears perfectly acceptable can, on closer inspection, contain faults.

A small tweak can have a huge impact.

A huge change may have no impact.

They can both go stale if they're not looked after well.

Most biscuits and many careers have a use-by date.

Sticking to the recipe rigidly can lead to problems when ingredients aren't available.

Being flexible and open to uncertainty can be empowering.

Sometimes you need the services of someone more experienced to see how to make improvements.

Overindulgence can lead to illness and possibly require the services of a doctor.

There is no perfect biscuit. Many varieties can be enjoyed at different times in your life.


Inspired by this article by Jim Bright, Professor of Career Education and Development ACU, and the following recipe from the Family Circle Biscuits and Slices recipe book.

Cocoa Sesame Biscuits aka Crunchy Wholesome Career Biscuits
3/4 c plain flour
1/4 c cocoa powder
3/4 c rolled oats
1 c sesame seeds
3/4 c caster sugar
100g unsalted butter
2 Tablespoons golden syrup
1 Tablespoon boiling water
1 teaspoon bicarb soda
185 g melted chocolate bits

Oven @ 160C

Flour, cocoa, oats, seeds and sugar go into a bowl.
Melt butter and golden syrup. Add soda to boiling water - dissolve. Add to the butter mix.
Add the wet to the dry ingredients. Stir.
Put teaspoons of mixture onto baking sheet. (The original recipe called for 3 Tablespoons of mixture per biscuit there was only space for one on the tray, and it became the side of a dinner plate - there was clearly something wrong.)
After 6 minutes spin the tray around or they burn. Leave another 6 mins. Ladle melted chocolate on top when they're cool!

Of course I didn't stick to the recipe the first time did I. The sesame seeds only came in mingy bags and I got the last one at the store so I added a few more oats and some chocolate buds. I cooked one giant sized one as per instructions which spread hugely and was unmanageable. Because it lacked pizzaz I chopped up some crystalized ginger and added that to the mixture and adjusted the size to 1 teaspoon per biscuit. As for the chocolate topping, it was ho hum ... so I added bit of chilli chocolate for interest!

As for the second time I made them, experience told me that further small changes could be made to improve the outcome! (A large change of different oats or flour really wouldn't change the taste a lot). A gentle shake of black pepper found its way into the batter along with more generous amounts of crystalized ginger. The topping oozed chilli this time, and the book has been duly marked with the additions.

Next time I might try some rum soaked raisins instead of the ginger!

Whoever would have thought that careers and cooking biscuits could have so much in common!

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Suddenly my job seems pointless.

People sometimes say about their workplace: "I'm thinking of chucking it all in. I can't stand this place any longer."

Others come to see me with stories along the lines of "I'd just bought a morning coffee and realised I couldn't face going back to work. I phoned my boss from the car to say I wouldn't return. Ever."

While the latter is more extreme, it's not uncommon and often leaves the employer as stunned as the former employee.

People who've walked out of their workplace never to return, usually say they weren't conscious of being particularly unhappy. It was as if something surfaced from deep within resulting in a sense of physical revulsion. They talk of a feeling of bewilderment; of having been as surprised as everyone else by this unprovoked and out of character action.

Often they'll sit at home for a week or more trying to make sense of what's happened to them, but this doesn't always lead to particularly useful insights.

To result in this dramatic reaction, something has been deeply out of kilter, and after discussion it generally becomes clear that personal values haven't been acknowledged by the employee or have been trampled on by a manager. However, because values aren't usually discussed in any meaningful way in western culture, it's likely that they haven't been acknowledged or clarified in the person's private life.

What can you do (right now) if you have a sudden overwhelming feeling of revulsion about work and are feeling caught in a web that you can't seem to escape from?

• Stop.
• If possible find somewhere quiet to sit. (To answer the unspoken question: Yes, some people can only find peace in the washroom. It usually provides privacy and you hopefully won't be interrupted!) 
• Breathe slowly and regularly. Take in 3 deep breaths and let them out in a controlled  s l o w  manner. It's harder to panic when you're focused on filling your lungs with air!
• Do a body scan: Mentally audit your limbs, organs, torso and head to get a sense of where the tension has settled - you'll notice a tightness, lump, sense of suffocation or queasiness somewhere when you pause quietly and take time to systematically check in. A body scan can sometimes be a quick process or can take a half hour or more. Don't shortchange yourself by rushing!
• Now, most importantly, when you sense where the discomfort is, stay settled. It's perfectly normal and tempting to avoid mental discomfort and metaphorically run - by turning on the radio or TV, picking up a book, checking social media or deciding you need a cup of coffee ..... Stick with it, you'll thank yourself later on.
• Some people report mentally "seeing" a writhing lump of spaghetti-like substance, others use dreary colours to describe an immovable mass. The description is as individual as you are and there are no right or wrong descriptions.
• Acknowledge and make room for the discomfort. As I mentioned, some people report the feeling of a golf ball in the throat, difficulty breathing or nausea.  Don't try to push the sensation down, belittle the feelings, pretend they don't exist or be scornful and call yourself weak (see Do you bully yourself?) It can be hard to believe, but these feelings are perfectly normal amongst regular everyday people, mums, dads, aunties and uncles, whether they're high flying executives in powerful positions, TV presenters or comedians, artists or doctors. They're part of the human condition and most of us experience them from time to time. 
• As Russ Harris says; now observe the sensation as a curious scientist would. Not with heavy ham-fisted aggression, but gently and with interest. Some people look at the shape, colour and form of the discomfort and find it changes as they take time and allow it to be. (This sounds a bit weird and hippy, but isn't when you do it.)
• And the part which I personally find most powerful is this bit: instead of squashing down the unpleasant sensation, and metaphorically stomping on it to try to make it go away because it hurts and isn't nice, give it a bit of room. Make space for it. Let it stretch. Again, this sounds weird until you do it. What happens then is that it's not quite so horribly uncomfortable. It doesn't go away, it hasn't vanished, but you're not fighting it. 
• Instead of spending time and energy persistently battering uncomfortable feelings down, you give them their own space and whilst you mightn't be great mates you can co-exist with tolerance and acceptance. 
• Next think about your values. If you've completed a formal values clarification exercise, review it, starting with the ones that are not negotiable. Is there something out of kilter there? Something which surfaces when you give it time and space? Work gently through your list one at a time. 
• If you haven't completed a values clarification exercise, the following might be helpful: 

a) from The Confidence Gap by Russ Harris
b) a worksheet from Kelly Wilson adapted by Russ Harris

• It could be that it's not an unethical workplace which is the issue, but that your home life (which you value deeply) is being swamped by work demands leaving you depleted and feeling that something important is passing you by.

And while it may be that nothing will change immediately, by spending time quietly thinking about what's important in your life, you'll gain clarity and understanding and this knowledge will empower you to take appropriate committed action. 

Appropriate action could be to make deliberate changes in relation to conflicting demands on your time: To make space for, and prioritise family, exercise, wholesome food and to give yourself time to enjoy these things. 

Appropriate action could be more confronting too. Once you've become aware of what is disturbing you, how will you respond? If for instance, a colleague is being harassed, which conflicts with your deeply held value of social justice, you'll need to choose how to respond. Will you speak up and be supportive or not? If you don't speak up, you'll experience further conflict - if you do there are costs (and advantages) to that decision as well. When you choose to live in line with your values, it makes some decisions obvious - but that doesn't necessarily make the resulting action easy. 

Without knowledge of what has unsettled you, you'll be making decisions in reaction to something and not proactively from a base of knowledge. 

If doing this alone doesn't work for you, find a coach or trainer who works from a base of values and contact them. The ACBS website is a good place to start and has members throughout the world.


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Snake catching; a niche career

A friend and I were discussing the challenge of job hunting for young people. Part time, casualised employment with no security, short term rolling contracts, no interest from many employers in ongoing training or career progression. This leaves a sour taste in the mouth when the employee is clearly unvalued and dispensable - and is told that they can be "walked" (ie their employment terminated) on whim because there are plenty of people waiting for any job at all.

We then got to discussing self employment - not everyone is cut out for doing their own promotion, advertising in an attention grabbing way and finding clients. However, here's a self employed man providing a service which is clearly in demand - clients seek him out at all hours of the day and night.

Certainly it's got its challenges and isn't for everyone, however the snake man is providing an important niche service. His customers are no doubt delighted to see him arrive - and leave!

http://www.youtube.com/user/ssssnakeman

Interestingly, within 24 hours of discussing the snake man, I received this text from my friend:

I've just met the snake catcher in person. I was having a cuppa with a friend on the back deck and a tiger snake dropped out of a tree right next to our dog in the backyard. Dog saved. Snake under the house somewhere. Can't be found at present. 

I suspect the conversation changed direction quickly!

And with Spring well and truly here, no doubt there'll be many more callouts from citizens not comfortable with sharing their backyard with venomous snakes.

He's got some great stories on his facebook site, and his youtube videos give a real insight into the expertise needed in this line of work. It's definitely not a career change I'll be making!



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Are facebook business pages a fad, or the future of social media marketing?

Well, I've finally taken the plunge (again) and relaunched my traverselife Facebook page. It's been a year and a half since my last post which is hardly something to crow about.

Honestly, you'd think that having survived the drama of having a web site constructed and starting a blog, (which involved a lot of internal angst) that it wouldn't be too hard to post on Facebook business pages. Not so. There's something I find very challenging about being "out there" in public with the potential to be torn to shreds by trolls - frankly it's unsettling.

But as I commented in my last post, Can blogging support your values? the benefits are there.

So when I was contacted by a young, keen and above all, knowledgeable, social media enthusiast regarding creating a business presence on Facebook I thought I should give it a go ... again.

This time, however, I wasn't alone, bumbling along, not really knowing what I was doing. Amelia (on Twitter: @AvidComms) walked me through such things as an over arching storyline, daily themes, the use of photos and using hoot suite to schedule posts.

In short she made a Facebook business page seem logical and achievable. Something that even a somewhat disorganised (cough, cough) person like me could do!

Like many people, self promotion doesn't come easily to me, so even letting clients know it was up and running was a bit of a challenge. However it's all happening over there, email invitations have been sent, received and acted on, and I have gone from a decidedly uninspiring 7 "Likes" to 30+ in a couple of days which feels very supportive and is extremely encouraging.

Armed with a bit more discipline and structure I hope to provide links to interesting articles, some posts I've written, and exchange comments and interact with current clients, as well as with people I may never meet in person; and I welcome you as well!! I'm not sure how it'll go, but I'll certainly do my best to provide interesting, informative and hopefully useful content.

I expect I'll refine this as I go on, but at present I've described my traverselife page as relating to further education, career development and workplace communication as well as using ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Training) and mindfulness techniques to support career transition, improve workplace happiness and assist overall wellbeing.

The current focus for weekday posts is:

• Monday - Education
• Tuesday - Job hunting
• Wednesday - In the workplace
• Thursday - Mindfulness
• Friday - Working towards retirement

If you're on Facebook please drop by and say hello! ;-)

Interestingly, since I wrote this post I've been to a local small business networking meeting and the topic for next time is Social Media: Marketing and monetizing your company. I hope the speaker doesn't just focus on Twitter like one book I borrowed from the library did!

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Posted by Sue Travers

Workplace distractions

Normally I'm able to concentrate on my clients extremely well, but usually I'm working in surrounds conducive to sustained focus. A quiet, non-distracting environment works well, my clients get my undivided attention. It enables them to also focus deeply which they find empowering, they are able to think deeply about their responses to situations, questions and to explore their values in a supportive, calm environment.

Occasionally, however, I have a client who asks if we can meet in a cafe rather than in my office. It's not usual, but I try to accomodate when it's appropriate.

Recently, at a beachside cafe, open to the elements, with a beautiful outlook over Port Phillip Bay and a gentle breeze playing idly about the patrons I was distracted to the point of apologetically reaching for my phone to capture this cheeky visitor.

He'd been hopping about, getting more and more insistent that we share some crumbs with him. I know it's unhealthy for birds to share our food as they're not designed to eat processed flour, but I really didn't believe he'd be game enough to hop so close.

I was wrong.


The cards we were working with are the Knowdell Values cards which are a useful tool for clarifying values and lead to deeper exploration about what makes your work-life meaningful.

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Book review: “Working with Bitches: Identify the Eight Types of Office Mean Girls and Rise Above Workplace Nastiness” by Meredith Fuller

US edition available 2013!

If you've never worked with a bitch, it's hard to understand the anguish it can bring day after long day, week after long week. It's almost impossible to imagine the impact it can have on every aspect of your life; sleeping can be disrupted while you churn over the day, eating can be problematic and leisure time eroded with the ongoing distress of belittling, malicious and downright nasty behaviour. Frustration, self doubt, anger, confusion and exhaustion are words commonly used to attempt to describe the experience. "Working with Bitches" isn't a pop psychology book. It's solidly grounded in theory, knowledge and the experience of working with a diverse range of clients over many years. Meredith Fuller is a loved and respected Melbourne psychologist who interviewed a wide range of women for the stories selected, to shed light on different kinds of bitchy behaviour. The stories give a sense of the personal challenges many women face in working with bitches. They are a glimpse into a wide range of unhealthy workplace dynamics - some are harrowing and you wonder how anyone gets away with such appalling behaviour. All the stories are very readable, and I found myself identifying behaviours I'd seen in different workplaces in a new and helpful way. Not only are the behaviours named and clearly identified, but the possible effect of the behaviour on the target is outlined, along with an explanation of why the bitch may behave in a particular way. Equally helpful are realistic suggestions for dealing with the challenging boss or co-worker and practical strategies are presented in a series of 'what to do' lists. Throughout the book are reminders that not all nasty, mean behaviour is bitchy, even though it may appear that way. There could well be other causes, and in addition there may be a need at some stage for deep self reflection as well. The second part of the book delves more deeply into psychological issues and I found I needed to concentrate more carefully. The possible role of fear and archetypes are discussed as well as different communication styles: for instance a preference for either using the head (Thinking) or heart (Feeling) can lead to difficulty with communication. Age related issues are also discussed, with the possibility for difference and misunderstandings explained helpfully. Whilst "Working with Bitches" has been written by a woman, for women who are working with bitches, I'll certainly buy a copy for my son. I believe it'll give him an insight into behaviours that may otherwise have been perplexing or even have gone unnoticed. The sections on communication styles, learning to say no, managing workplace stress, and strategies for deciding whether to stay or leave an unsatisfactory workplace are equally as relevant to him and other men as they are to women in the workforce. Disclaimer: Meredith Fuller was one of my psychology lecturers when I was at college some 25+ years ago. She was inspirational, enthusiastic and knowledgeable. We came into contact again a couple of years back when we were facilitating Myers Briggs Type Inventory (MBTI) workshops with university students. Meredith has included some of my workplace experiences in the book, however I receive no freebies or financial gain from book sales.  My personal interest in, and professional experience of supporting targets of workplace bullying and bitchiness goes back many years.  I am pleased to celebrate Meredith Fuller's hard work and enthusiasm which have led to the publication of this excellent, helpful and readable book. .

Redundancy hurts

I’ve heard some fabulous stories about people who’ve been made redundant: The vision of an older man, skipping between desks while stressed workmates hunch over mounds of paperwork, shouting “Yes! I’m leaving! I’m out of here!” is one I won’t forget in a while!

For many people, however, the reality of redundancy is very different.

Teachers and academics who have loved their workplace and invested years of time and energy to improving outcomes for students, and who are living through the erosion of a once proud institution, suffer.

The pain of redundancy applies equally to many other career people who’ve dedicated their lives to a particular sector, whether they be health care or emergency workers, government employees, or blokes in the steel or motor industries.

They’ve often seen the writing on the wall, and are aware that things are changing, long before jobs begin to go in a structured formal way. Budget cuts, departments being amalgamated, a sense that the story isn’t being told in an open and honest way, create a sense of unease that is hard to shake.

There can be a deep sorrow for the loss of all you’ve worked for, which can’t be eradicated by being told to “look for another job”. This hasn’t been just a job. It’s been a career, an integral part of your life for years – that isn’t something caring, dedicated employees shake off with a single outplacement session.

Our identities are often shaped around our worklife. Our work leads to getting up at a particular time, our commute, where and with whom we have lunch, what we discuss, argue about; the banter and camarederie. The loss of the familiarity and routine and in particular the loss of colleagues can result in grief. This needs to be acknowledged, not dismissed by the outplacement service provider.

Some employees find that their shaken world view has been ignored or overlooked by outplacement services designed to “Sit them down, tell them what they need to know, check the resume, give some job hunting tips, and get them out ready for the next one.” Whilst that might be satisfactory for some, there are others who exit that type of interview shattered. I’ve seen tough blokes, as well as strong women, desolate and weeping after such an experience. This type of interview is nothing like an in-depth career counselling session and it would be better for all if it wasn't presented as such.

The sterile interview experienced by too many redundant workers, is functional, regimented, routine and leaves them without hope, feeling that somehow they are to blame for not being ready to move on immediately.

When there’s significant change, we can experience confusion about our role and identity. Self-esteem can be deeply shaken. Questions emerge which may never have been thought about before: Who will I become? What is important? Who do I want to be? What do I value? How do I want to contribute in the future?

“Sometimes our history limits our imaginations”. 
We may need help to see opportunities, rather than believing that what we’ve worked at, is all we can ever do. Not everyone has the luxury to take time off to ponder these issues. However putting aside time to let your brain go into free fall without pressuring yourself with “I have to decide by…” or “I’ve got to start applying for new jobs immediately”, “I’m only trained to do this, I can’t do anything else” can allow you to be open to unexpected, interesting and new ways of thinking about the issue.

It really is time well spent.

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If you or someone you know has come out of an outplacement interview which has been less than satisfactory, please encourage them to seek assistance and support elsewhere - not all services are the same. If the service is provided by the exiting company, please let HR know it wasn't suitable. They're paying good money for these services, and our employees who are being made redundant deserve an appropriate level of support. Feeling shattered, useless and unheard should not be part of the deal.

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A tiny amount of effort can make the world of difference.

Imagine for a moment that you're in a workplace, and there have been a few veiled comments that someone you know, but aren't particularly close to is being bullied. Let's for the moment call her Sheila, but it could as easily be Chip, Ahn, Stephan, Narasimha or Lee.

What's it to you? After all Sheila has friends, you've seen them going for a walk, chatting over lunch and you know they sometimes go out for a drink after work some Fridays.

But Sheila looks dreadful, she seems weighed down and no longer makes witty quips to her friends. The spring has gone from her step and you've heard she no longer goes out for lunchtime walks or to the Pub after work. She has become hesitant, nervous, wary and on edge, sometimes snapping for no apparent reason.

What comes as a surprise to many people is that whilst they know the target of a bully needs support it's rare for that person to be receiving the level of support they desperately need. I'm not referring to assistance from HR or legal options. I'm talking about the little everyday things that help make life bearable, so that the target doesn't feel so dreadfully, painfully alone.

Clearly, something is wrong with Sheila. Perhaps it's more than a temporarily grumpy boss, and she is being systematically hounded, harassed, mobbed or bullied.

But
a) you don't know what to do
b) you think someone else is helping/supporting - she's got lots of friends, right?
c) you think that what you have to offer is too minimal to make a difference

It's so easy to assume that someone else is helping. But there are all sorts of reasons this may not happen: One person may be struggling with their own issues and not notice, another may be concerned that if they're seen to support they will become the next target, and many others think "Surely her closer friends are helping. I'm not really that important to her." (More on this here)

Time and time again, I've had people say to me: "I felt so alone, it's like no-one noticed or cared."

My request to you is to show you care. Never assume the target has allies. The bully regularly has cronies, they can be powerful, nasty, vicious and unrelenting in their subtle and not so subtle undermining ways. The target rarely has the same level of support.

The simplest of things can make all the difference and let the target know they're not alone. In all sorts of unobtrusive ways you can show you care. A "thinking of you" text or email. A stick-it note with a smiley face or amateurish sketch of a bunch of flowers or clown. A kind word. An offer to have a coffee together. An email with a beautiful/inspiring/amusing photo attached. You don't really need to say much or commit to deep involvement. A variety of support is important, and your role may not need to be more than this.

Tactful support is mostly welcome; ask if you're unsure. Remember, you may be the only person to show you care. 

Here's a link to a post describing a situation I've witnessed far too many times - the tell tale signs of abuse and the debilitating suffering and legacy of unrelenting bullying.

Examples of artistic creativity might give the target hope
and remind them there is beauty in the world.

There's more information that could support the target here, here and here, and a book review on "Working with Mean Girls" by Meredith Fuller (which is equally relevant to men!)

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