On being lectured - a grumble

Please don't lecture that I'm doing something wrong when I admit my blog posts can take a day to write. Don't tell me they should be shorter when you've never read one. It’s unhelpful insisting "the experts say" they should only take twenty minutes.

You don't have a blog, have never read one and don't "do" social media. One day you'll realise it’s challenging to find the right words for your particular audience, to share a serious message which can be readily understood.

It’s not easy.

"Experts" aren't always right and it’s worth taking time to share complex ideas thoughtfully.

Stop and think before you speak - is criticism helpful?

 .......

A drabble is a story written in 100 words. No more. No less.

How not to procrastinate in 4 (x2) easy steps.

Point one: Never, never, never look at photos, even if it's work related, and you need a specific one to illustrate a point when there's a deadline looming. That photo will hide maliciously and other ones  that bring back pleasurable memories of long summery walks along the beach will appear to delay and distract you from the impending doom.

This bloke looks like he's going to be sucked into the ocean.

Every photo will beg loudly for a blog post to be written about it.

I love the way the kelp at the back of the rocks stands up
and how the water at the front is trickling over the ledge.

Be strong, don't allow them to distract.

Point two: Do not under any circumstances allow even the merest hint of social media to rear its ugly time sapping head. Not Facebook, not Twitter and certainly NOT G+. Bad, bad, bad G+.

Bad Google for allowing it to be invented.

Bad G+rs for posting such interesting photos and intriguing information.

The Pacific Gulls are unconcerned about the crashing waves.

Remove any social media links from your tabs. The sneakiest hint of something interesting happening on-line is enough to suck up an hour or so. At least. If not more.

Point three: Turn off any alerts for email messages coming in. It's not going to be life threatening if you ignore it! It doesn't matter if you look at it in an hour or so - after you've slurped another cup of tea and made a tempting tea cake to reward you for all that intense concentration and proved that you can resist the temptation of procrastinating!

Point four: Turn off your phone and take it outside and bury it. Deep. Very deep. Throw away the spade into the nearest passing truck that's on a non stop service to the farthest point in the country.

Arck, argh, ergh. Focus... This can be done

The crest on the centre left is a combination of waves crashing into each other
from different directions. Definitely not good for swimming.

The increased stress levels aren't worth it. There's heaps of short-lived entertainment, but eventually a minor meltdown as the deadline looms larger and more threatening.

1.  Splash face with cold water. 

2.  Three minutes of exercise. 

3.  Munch on a piece of fruit. 

4.  And go for it!

After taking my own advice, I'm pleased to say my conference presentation is almost ready! Hooray!!
CDAA 2012 in Canberra, here I come :)


Note: No phone was injured to enable my presentation to be completed. 



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Making space in a crowded schedule

Has anyone else noticed how easy it is to give sound advice to others, but how hard it is to take that advice yourself?

I’ve mentioned before how important good sleep, healthy diet, adequate exercise, mindfulness and hanging out with friends are for general wellbeing. Of course I know these things are equally, if not more important to pursue when things aren’t going so well. Having said that, it’s then that they seem to go down the gurgler.

A local employer, BlueScope Steel at Hastings, has recently laid off 270 people, and I’ve been involved in the services offered to help these employees retrain and find future employment, all of which I am not only good at, but thoroughly enjoy. I like being part of a professional team using my skills, lateral thinking, knowledge of retraining options and career development to help make the path from redundancy to re-employment as smooth as humanly possible.

These men who have worked with steel, have loved their work and the culture at BlueScope and many are really suffering with new, painful, raw emotions: grief, loss, frustration, panic, anger and fear. Being able to assist and support is a great privilege, but there is a personal impact as well.

Other than not getting enough exercise, eating poorly and having too much sugar and coffee, (all of which I advise others to beware of) one of the other things I’ve skimped on is blogging. Blogging has come to be surprisingly important in my weekly schedule by giving me a space to reflect and grapple with issues of values, ethics, integrity and many other things as well. But it’s also very time consuming: writing, visiting others, reading, commenting and replying to comments has gone by the board.

I’m keen to get back to discussions about bullying, as well as the recovery process and techniques for healing, including mindfulness, and I’ve missed visiting your blogs! However, for the time being, blogging and all its pleasures will have to wait as I focus on this work role, cook healthier meals and get adequate exercise and rest.


cheers

Sue
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Blog break continues.

I'll be back in a couple of weeks as I am unlikely to be have internet connection on the journey home. The plan is to return to Victoria via western NSW. Hope to see you back here then.

South Bank. Brisbane 2011.

blog break

Hello,

I'm taking a blog break, and hope to be back mid to late June when I'll be at the 'Happiness and its Causes' conference in Brisbane. I hope to see you here when I return, full of interesting research into the brain and how we construct our own happiness.

till then

toodleoo

Tweed Heads. NSW.

A-Z Blogging Challenge. Reflections

What a journey, what a month.

Firstly a humungous thankyou to Arlee at Tossing it Out and his very able crew for hosting. It's been a massive job for you all, and I appreciate the time and energy that you've all put into this event.

Congratulations, well done!

What I've learnt:
Most importantly, don't tackle two blogs in the A-Z Blogging challenge without preparation! It wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done. It was utterly exhausting, demanding, draining and I'd never recommend it - ever - to anyone who has an ounce of common sense.

I'd seen the buttons around the blogosphere and wondered what the A-Z challenge was about and thought it looked like fun, so entered my 'for me' blog - jumpingaground - that was all fine and good. Then, on March 31st  I had a rush of blood to my head and decided at that late stage to enter my more formal blog. That's plain crazy!

One entry? No worries.
Drabbles? Fine.
Two entries? Insane!

The alliterative Drabbles were fun to write over at jumpingaground , although I found it hard to turn off once I got on a roll. All stories are based on real people and events except Yolanda and her yellow yacht. Many are environment or climate related, others are to do with learning difficulties.

I suspect the idea of writing about bullying had been floating around in my head, lurking, just waiting for an opportunity like this. The structure worked for me. I think if I'd been left to my own devices I wouldn't have attempted it at all or I would have drifted and dithered, with a bit here and a bit there. A-Z provided the scaffolding I needed to do it in one hit.

My list of A-Z Workplace Bullying posts is here.

Before I started, I had no idea how long each post would take. I spent 1/2 a day getting a vague outline together to make sure I would have something for each letter, realised I had something sort of workable, and plunged in. I hadn't anticipated each post would then take many many hours, revising, rewording, checking for accuracy, editing and adding pictures. Some are a bit long, but that's the way they are.

I'm tenacious. This is not good if you're being bullied. It could be possible to hang on and try to make something work when it's destined not to. But for a blogging challenge it's invaluable!

I'll try to remember never to post a comment when I've had a glass or two of wine. It's not good. Now you know why some of those comments were, erm not so clearly written. 

It would have been difficult to have completed the posts without the support and input from other bloggers. Each and every comment helped me get through. This topic isn't fun or popular or sexy - to read or to write. Your comments were, and still are, welcomed and cherished.

Why tackle workplace bullying?  I hope these posts might be a resource beyond this challenge. I'm horrified at the prevalence of ongoing bullying in workplaces. As a Career Development Professional, my clients tell me what happens in supposedly reputable organisations. The people I work with are honest, ethical, have strong morals and act with integrity. Too many workplaces don't value those attributes, they chew up employees, take everything they can get, then spit out what's left. I felt my addition to exposing some of the tactics used by bullies was a small something I could do to support others and perhaps shed some light on this appalling behaviour.

Knowledge is power. My aim was to share my knowledge in a hopefully easy to read form to empower others.

What I've learnt about others. People are generous. Of course I knew that, but it's been underlined hugely. People have supported me by encouraging others to read the information, they've forwarded the posts on and have commented in a very positive way. That's what I dreamed might happen. Thanks to everyone who has shared and commented.

What have I learnt about blogging?
Success is just a word. Running the two blogs in tandem was fascinating. jumpingaground went from something like 22 followers to 83, but I don't get many drop in visitors or many hits. Keyword search data is wishy washy at best.  But it's fun, and it's for me!

In comparison, traverselife went from about 22 followers to 52, which in comparison is 'unsuccessful'. Keyword searches however, show clearly what people are looking for, and I get significantly more hits daily but less or no comments. I've had quiet, consistent, steady support for the posts from people within and outside the blogging community. That's rewarding. People who've contacted me have given me a huge boost, It really makes this feel like a strong community pulling together, and is a reassuring feeling of connectedness. Thankyou.

East Side Gallery. Berlin. 2009.

For me, the month wasn't fun, but it supported my core values and it has been rewarding doing something I truly believe in. I've done the best I can given that it was unplanned and in a sense done on the fly to conform to the challenge guidelines. I'm pleased with the result, and proud I stuck with it. I wouldn't post like that again for a whole month. It took too much out of me. I need a break.

What do I look for in other blogs?
Meatiness, fun, not self indulgent, interesting, challenging without being derogatory or rude.

What next? 
I might do a follow up with something about schools and bullying, add some more links to some good information. Editing needs to happen....drat..... I want to pose the question "Do you bully yourself?" and look at how we're often meaner to ourselves than is healthy. I'm looking forward to eventually writing about the healing process after being bullied. Looking at how we can create rich, full and meaningful lives is something I've wanted to post about, but haven't yet found a structure that feels right. I also want to revisit assertiveness and How to say "No".

Would I recommend this challenge to others? Definitely!

I've just had some insight when I was making a comment on someone else's blog. I went in to this Challenge asking myself what I could GIVE to others. I wasn't focusing on how many followers or comments I could GET.  Hmmm.....

Lastly, I have a newfound respect for everyone who has written a book. How do you do it and stay sane? Characters who wander off and create mayhem, plots that refuse to co-operate - gosh you guys are impressive!

How to make a hyperlink (clicky) signature here

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Who me? Stylish?!

An award for my blog, wheee! Thanks Helen (Straight from Hel). I'm delighted, and will try not to let it go to my head!

It's a relief it's for my blog, not me, but horrors, does that mean that the pressure's on?

Now, let's see .... Oh dear there are rules, I'm not so good with them usually, but we'll see how I go this time.


Hmm: List 7 things about yourself and pass the award on to 7 others. Seems simple enough (now I've worked out how to copy and paste the award!)


*finds pencil, starts chewing it, wanders around the house procrastinating, gets in the washing from the line before the night air begins to settle, has a cup mug of tea, folds washing, pours a beer, thinks about dinner, pours another beer, gets dinner, greets son who has come home to visit...*

Um, maybe this isn't so easy...

finally knuckles down...


1.  My parents built their house; materials were rationed after the war, and it took years for them to finish it. The plans for the house came from USA and it was called a California Bungalow.

2.  I cycled to school on a 'girls bike' which didn't have gears but did have a back pedal brake. I reckon in an emergency I would automatically try to push backwards on the pedals of my current modern bike.

3.  I've trekked close to Kali Patar near the base of Mt Everest. I suffered from altitude sickness, so couldn't get to base camp.

4.  I get vertigo snorkelling in deep water.

5.  I over-think things.

6.  I still love getting the (snail) mail in.

7.  Sometimes I can't spell for nuts.

Now, 7 recipients! Drum roll please ......

1. Brits in the USA - I get a lot of pleasure from David's writing, his preparedness to tackle tough issues, his photos and wicked sense of humour.
2. Boonie's Thailand Photos - Boonie's photos, commentary, wit and wisdom bring lightness into my life.
3. Shaking the Tree - Miss Becky takes beautiful photographs and makes perceptive observations about her photos and life.
4. Life's a Poodle - The creators of this blog are champions for children who learn differently. How stylish is that!
5. The Giraffability of Digressions - The first blog I ever followed. Cruella was introduced to me by the brilliant Australian comedian Adam Hills when he proudly mentioned her in a show as his 'Norwegian stalker'. Thankyou Adam!
6. Coffee Rings Everywhere - stylish photos, brilliant Drabbles. Rayna inspired me to try my hand at Drabbling. It's addictive!
7. Middle Passages - I came across Liza's blog late last year and read it from the beginning. Beautifully crafted insight into the life of someone who was made redundant. Complete with very stylish photos.

That was harder than I thought, all the blogs I read are stylish, and I found I wanted to share with everyone... ah well, next time!

*I'm going to digress now. Has any one else ever gone into a slightly negative state when something positive like this happens? I've been known to react with "oh they were just being nice, I'm not doing anything as good as ... (insert title of blog you think is really cool here)"? I found the same thing happened when The Burrow included some of my drabbles in their Valentine Calendar. I thought "it's only because no one else entered the competition". My mother would have said it's false pride, but I'm not so sure, I genuinely find it hard to assess what I'm doing. I often ask: Am I articulating clearly, is it garbled, am I being too long winded, how can I improve, things like that....See 5 above: I over-think things!

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The difference between blogs, forums and social networks - revisited

An overview of some of the differences between blogs, forums and social networks from the perspective of a Career Development Professional, for those who requested it.

Facebook

Gets some dreadful press, but you have the choice to be as public or private as you want. It's YOUR choice.

Having read the horror stories gleefully presented in the media, I was extremely hesitant about joining Facebook (as well as Twitter and having a blog) - the possibility of identity fraud is very real, but hopefully not as common as the media portray.  (I haven't done any research on this, so if anyone has some statistics I'd be interested in a ratio. Given that the members of Facebook are said to be the equivalent as the population of a largish country that statistic would be interesting.)

Many people have been alienated by the demonising of social networking in the media, and I believe they're missing out on what can be a relatively safe and interesting medium, personally, and possibly professionally.

If you take similar (but different!) precautions as you would in the world in general, mostly things will be fine.

The same as you wouldn't give a stranger your personal details, you don't do it online. That alone is a real challenge when you're presenting a professional profile, and one which I'm still grappling with. How do you let potential clients know you're keen to do business with them, while simultaneously keeping a comfortable level of anonymity?

I mostly use Facebook as a mini postcard style of communication with family and close friends, and it's 'invite only'.  It's a quick and convenient way to connect, and is used quite differently to email. The messages are brief, you can attach photos and friends are able to comment. It's great for feeling connected when you are away from home, just to check in and see what your friends are up to. It's a much more abbreviated form of communication.

At the CDAA conference in April a number of members in the education sector were extremely cautious about Facebook, focusing on instances of intimidation, bullying and sexual predators as relating to young students.

Please remember the issues young people face are different from those of a mature professional with a bit of life experience. It's your choice who you 'friend' or not, and who you give personal details out to, as well as how public or private you want to be.

I've set up a 'Professional' Facebook page accessible by anyone (I think), but haven't yet embraced it fully, I'm not convinced it's worthwhile, but I've got an open mind there. If you can share any ideas about effectiveness and how to use it to advantage that'd be good.

Jeremiah Owyang, has an excellent explanation of Forums, Blogs and Social Networks. Click on his name to read the full article.

Excerpts with some commentary follows - but I give full credit to Jeremiah Owyang for the main ideas which appear in inverted commas.

Blogs

"Blogs are like a keynote speech where the speaker (blogger) is in control of the discussion, but allows questions and comments from the audience" (the reader). Some will allow, and reply to your comments, others don't.

"Blogs may be journals often authored by one individual, and sometimes teams." They may be purely visual, showcasing photos or paintings, poetry, haiku, craft or science. You name it, it'll be out there somewhere. Support groups for people with illnesses or for those wanting to improve their writing. Blogs about blogs. The weird, the wonderful and the serious. Some fun ones also encourage a lot of interaction and set challenges for readers who contribute either for pleasure or the chance of a prize.

By no means are all blogs written by navel gazing neer-do-wells with nothing better to do with their time. I'm not sure where this myth came from, but I heard it many times, and it's still alive and well - and very wrong. As with so many other things in life, look around till you find something you like (whether for intellectual stimulation, creativity or to be challenged by; it's worth the time spent).

Blogs may be "used to talk with the marketplace" (or clients) "and to join the conversation that existing external bloggers may be having".

Social networks

"Social networks are like topic tables at a conference luncheon". The kind of conference where signs "invite people to sit and join others of like interest". "Social networks allow members to organize around a person's relationships or interests" - the community can become very close knit, meeting both on-line and in person. People who know (or want to meet each other) will connect by a variety of common interests.

An example is Crazy Guy on a Bike where forums, journals, reviews and articles all vie for attention. "These are great tools to get people of like interest to connect to each other and share information". However, they require a dedicated person to moderate comments, and generally keep an eye on things as everyone has a more or less equal status, and no one person is the author.

Twitter


I've made a couple of tweets, but couldn't see how it would be useful on a professional level. At the moment, I feel I don't have time to add another thing to my day.

Professionally though, am I missing something obvious?   I'd love to hear from anyone using Twitter: How do you use it in your business? Is it useful? How? What do you tweet? Who is interested? Can it attract business or do you use it to build your profile?

.......................

It seems like I'm not the only person asking this question about Twitter. It was raised on a Career Development forum while I was editing this post, and was discussed in the Mind Tools newsletter I dipped in to this afternoon. Even though the Mind Tools article is interesting, it seems more relevant to larger businesses, and I'm still unsure how Twitter would be used by CD practitioners.

To tweet or not, that is the question.


Stephen Fry has written an extensive piece about how he uses Twitter.  I suspect I'm going to need to revisit this  topic again in the not too distant future.


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Blogging benefits? Revisited from CDAA workshop 2010.

Back on the 19th April 2010 after speaking at the CDAA (Career Development Association of Australia) conference in Adelaide, and at the beginning of this blog's life I asked myself the following question:

"Why have I created this blog?" 


At my workshop and others, as well as in informal gatherings, there'd been a lot of discussion about whether blogging and other social media could in any way benefit CD practitioners. I understood benefit to mean "can it help us grow our profile and get more business?" Growing your business isn't a bad goal when you're a private practitioner. Or was it just going to be a timewaster?

If you're going to spend up to *2 hours per day or more on social media it needs to be worthwhile. This of course begs the question of one's definition of 'worthwhile' ;)

*I really didn't believe this figure when I first heard it, I thought I must have misheard, and they meant 2 hours per week: surely it couldn't take two hours per day could it? Yes, it probably will.

Dinosaur bead, a visual reminder not to be one

Not wanting to be a dinosaur, and with the expectation that our ppt's would be available for members to access after the conference, I jumped in - I figured that putting the ppt on a blog would be the least stressful option given that mine consisted mainly of pictures that needed explanation.

 - That's the rationale for the creation of the blog -

Of course, life doesn't do what you expect, and as I've discovered, neither do blogs.

What have I learnt?

That blogging is really good for the things I initially thought it would be (this was my list from 19th April)

• clarifying thoughts
• neatness in presentation
• 'morning papers' as recommended by my mentor
• thinking aloud to work through problems
• self expression: finding out what I really think (at this moment)

It worked well for sharing the ppt. An added bonus was reminding myself why I wanted to work in a variety of settings rather than for one employer.

But the blog is valuable for all sorts of other things 

• communicating with clients on themes that a number of them are working on
• connecting with people outside my usual group - it's a whole new exciting world!
• stretching myself by exploring different ways of writing (not many of which I post)
• creativity - trying to make the posts more visually appealing by adding photos
• clear thinking and articulation of ideas (an ongoing battle)
• self confidence
• a challenge

It hadn't occurred to me that I would still be posting reasonably regularly 6 months down the track. I'd tried sending out a monthly newsletter via my website, but I never managed even a measly one. NOT ONE after months of procrastination, so to be here after 6 months is a real achievement. I'm kind of pleased with myself.

From a professional perspective

Has it been worthwhile? Yes.

Can you earn an income from it? I'm still unsure about that, but it's not my primary motivation.

Will I continue? Yes, I hope so.

There are times when I'm not exactly sure what shape this bloggy creature is taking, and I'm reminded of the wonderful poem "Interview" by Sydney Carter (I suspect it'd break copyright to include the whole poem, so I'll only include the last verse).

Where are you going next?

Like you, I ask that question.

I can only travel with the music.

I am full

of curiosity.

But perhaps I could, for once in my life, live with the curiosity, go with the flow and not overload myself with trying to understand the medium?

Freedom is precious

Isn’t it great to see a dog shaking itself vigorously and enthusiastically after it has just been swimming in the sea. Water flying everywhere, the head, ears and tail all get a thorough going over. And then that fabulously enthusiastic romping along the beach; and you can tell that as much as the dog has enjoyed the sea, the land is its more natural habitat.

It’s rather like I feel at present. You see I’ve recently had a great visit to China. Not far into the mainland, but far enough for Westerners to still be a bit of a novelty for some locals. It was my third visit – I’ve loved each experience though they’ve all been very different.

I remember studying Chinese history at primary school, and became fascinated with the culture. I immersed myself in Chinese fairy tales and dreamt of a time when the country would once again be open to foreigners.

In 1979 I joined a highly organized tour; at that time there were massive restrictions on the movement of both Westerners and locals. Mao suits were common, the bicycle was king, neon lights were a rarity and a local talking to a westerner was sure to be keenly watched by the police.

The countryside was everything I’d imagined making the fairy tales of my childhood come alive. The richness of The Opera and vibrant colours of circus performers, with acrobats doing amazing contortions and visits to kindergartens with brightly garbed children were at odds with the drabness of daily clothing on the streets. It was a dramatic contrast between the old and new.

My second visit was a couple of years ago. I wanted my children to experience a completely different culture; one rich in history, with a language, customs and political system so different to our own. China was going to host the Olympics, and it was a good time to visit.

How much the country had changed: stylish young ladies sashaying around in short skirts and heels with mobile phones to their ears; young men in shorts and t shirts with logos. Neon lights everywhere, advertising foreign as well as local brands, so many cars and so few bicycles. It was a culturally rich visit, and politically fascinating, particularly as one of our young guides wanted to discuss many of the changes that had taken place in recent years. China had taken massive strides to modernize and embraced many of the good (as well as some of the not so good), things from the west, and many citizens were clearly enjoying the changes.

And now we come to my recent visit and my Teflon brained forgetfulness. I’d forgotten that wearing modern western clothing and using computers and mobile phones has little relationship to the freedoms we in the west know.

Freedom to use and explore the internet - including blogs - is controlled in many countries.

I’m enjoying my foray into blogging, and appreciate contact with people throughout the world. However I was unable to access either my blog or any others for the duration of my otherwise very enjoyable visit. I was surprised at how cut off and frustrated I felt; I was able to see that people had commented, (via Gmail) but was unable to reply as I would have liked. I felt that I was rudely snubbing my visitors and wanted to apologise. I was champing at the bit waiting to find an airport hotspot where I could explain my predicament.

And so, back to my dog (I hope this analogy - or is it a metaphor? - is working). Like it, I have enjoyed my dip in the ocean, but unlike it, I am aware of undercurrents that may be hazardous. It’s good to be back on dry familiar land, have a good shake and resume my romp around the internet. This environment feels natural to me, but the freedom is a privilege which can be eroded all too easily.

TWiaAP - Norwegians in Australia

Pronunciation: tee wap

aka: The World is an Amazing Place

What word do you have for those random events that sometimes take your breath away? Not quite the Black Swan variety (that term is deservedly reserved for the more catastrophic event), but the "golly gosh, how did that happen?" garden variety, double take.

Here I am in my somewhat chilly kitchen, (the warmth from the wood heater hasn't spread this far yet) idly preparing dinner for my house guests who will descend ravenous, cold and soggy later in the evening.

What harm can there be to have a peek (a nano peek really - I promise!) to see what is happening out there in the electronic world, the blogosphere and cyberspace?!

The bald facts are as follows: Earlier this year, hubby and I went to see a fantastic amazingly uplifting "feel good" local comedian - Adam Hills. It was an unusual interactive performance, with mobile phones, tweeting, phone photos/videoing and the audience all getting a guernsey. After each show, Adam would blog about the event.

Now, as you know, I'm new to all this electronic media stuff, but I rashly decided to have a look at his blog, and possibly even more foolishly found the courage to comment. (more on this in a couple of days). Lo and behold, there I found a link to a Norwegian blog, the writer being an enthusiastic fan of Adam.

Next little factoid: My daughter has spent time in Northern Norway, (Andoya) and is rather partial to things Norwegian. So, being a "good mum" I had a look at this blog "The Giraffability of Digression" with the view of showing daughter that I'm not a total dinosaur when it comes to these things.

What a delight! This is not the navel gazing or self flagellation that I'd been warned to expect. But witty, charming and enticing, and with equally delightful links elsewhere.

Worlds within Worlds.

A further factoid. (it's ok, dinner is cooking merrily, so I feel justified in typing) Our current houseguest is (and this is where the expression TWiaAP comes in) ... Norwegian. I couldn't resist sharing Cruella's post about the little house with the giraffe. What I hadn't expected was for our guest to begin softly singing a jaunty little song from the TV show. How cool is that! How connected.

Adam would be proud.

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