Thursday, April 7, 2011

F: Friends - Bullying

Friends can help you navigate the stormy seas.
With permission from the artist: Terry Denton.
Never underestimate the power of friendships when you are experiencing any form of bullying. Whilst it may be very difficult if you are the target to explain what is happening, please make the effort!

Friends; listen kindly and patiently. The target may feel confused, foolish, apologetic, silly, embarrassed or any number of emotions and stumble to express the experience. Hopefully you can reassure that the experiencing is bullying behaviour and provide support through any formal procedures. If you're unsure, check out the links at the bottom of the post or seek professional advice from a practitioner experienced in this area.

Supportive measures can be as simple as phone call, having a cup of tea or going for a walk, but exercising together is even better!
Exercise is a great way to help deal with the effects of stress.

With one person, I sent a text message each day, starting with the letter A and going through to Z, describing how I felt about the bully. (A bit like this A-Z blogging challenge) I was told later that this was something the person looked forward to as it was a bit of lighthearted relief from the torment.
For parents, make the time to listen - just listen, don't take over. Prompt if necessary, but let the tears and anger, hurt and confusion come. Reassure the child that they have NOT done anything to bring the bullying upon themselves. It's important that they understand they're not being weak, they are trying to cope with a sneaky undermining individual who is in fact envious of your child's fine qualities.
Hanging out together is great.
Here tomorrow: Guilt

There are many outstanding resources on line. A couple I find useful are Bullying. No way! an Australian resource for teachers and students, and a UK site Bully On Line. This is in no way an exhaustive list, and each country will no doubt have equally good or more relevant websites. If you're being bullied please seek advice from a professional health care practitioner experienced in this area.

Over at jumpingaground I'm spending the month Drabbling using alliteration, mostly with an environmental theme.


David L Macaulay said...

nice post.I was going to do friends Sue, but I have another idea - g's bleak so far,,,

Tundiel said...

Friends are so, so important! My son never really had any friends for years, so it was extra hard to deal with the bullying. He's still having troubles now off and on, but he's made a couple of really good friends so the situation isn't nearly as upsetting for him.

And lookie here....

Princess of Procrastination

Yay! Thanks Sue!

fiziskandarz said...

thank you for sharing this :) it's good to read a good post like this to take a step back and remind ourself. how's spring there?